Okay, so I have to stop and say something here - I was midway with composing this over the course of the last few days… had a pretty great draft last night, and today something while I was at work pushed it RIGHT over the edge. I’ve dabbled in being open about this, as the last time I was open, it was used against me and someone claimed to have “connected” with me.
Just because you read these entries here, I need you to understand that like celebrities and models, you see what is given to you. You don’t see the whole iceberg underneath the surface. You see what I show you. I’ve always been open and genuine about my journey, but the truth I tell you here and the WHOLE truth are different privileges. What I provide here is indeed a connectivity to the world in which I live in and work through, but we all have our own perspectives and journey. You may very well see the things I write on here and not experience it the same way I do.
With that being stated for you all, I’ll continue to my point:
A LOT of people underestimate me
They take one look at me and judge me for being "privileged". They call me names; say I'm "obnoxious" when I’ve done the work they wont or can’t do; "emotional" when I invest my soul into something; that I "gloat" or show-off whatever it is I’m proud of - a project I'm working for, a relationship I'm building, a product I'm selling. No, if you knew me fully, you would know that there lies NO attitude within this body - my character does not consist of anything other than hard work towards ascertaining my goals.
Some don't think I'm scrappy or posses street smarts; nay, "street cred". Yes, while I may have enjoyed privileges growing up, I've had to work for what I have. I've had a lot given to me over the years, but I've also known struggle and what it feels like to not know where your next dollar is coming from.
The good part about that, is knowing that while I may have naïveté I can trust that when push comes to shove, I make shit happen.I hustle, or I bust my butt when I know I have to.
I doubt myself a lot but I’m resourceful and I get shit done when the time calls for it. I've never had the luxury of relying on others (aside from my gracious parents) and I’m grateful for that.
Contribute or Don’t
I've been called "controlling" or a dictator too... What I have to say in response is this:
While I may “bust your balls” if you’re in my life & contributing to my path, it’s only because I know what *I’m* capable of - I have a high standard for work ethic, as well as the stamp or brand I send out there, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let that falter.
Should you not be matching my effort, I’m either going to watch you in my dust cloud -OR- help build you and make you rise to the occasion.
Now, with that said - the choice is yours 💁🏼♀️
Please - rise to meet me, why don’t you?